More than Four

Christmas Thoughts

2009-12-20T16:24:00.005-06:00

Everyone is pretty excited around here. I truly cannot believe that Christmas is just five days away. I remember this time last year... we knew of three siblings in Ethiopia but had not seen their faces nor knew their names. I thought often of what this Christmas would be like, and now it is here.

I debated on sharing this, but feel it is a common adoption issue from everything we have read and studied. The girls had a little bit of difficulty during the week prior to their birthday party. We really think the "hype" of birthdays in America, the excitement and anticipation was a little too much and sent them into somewhat of an emotional over load. The day after the party was over everything seemed to settle back down, emotions calmed and behavior improved.

With the twins' birthday experience, we are trying to approach Christmas as simply as possible. For example, I usually have all the gifts wrapped and under the tree by now but think we'll hold off a few more days. As boring as it sounds, planning and structure have been the best tool Dustin and I have used during these days of adjustment. We were advised by our adoption caseworkers how important structure would be to the lives of our new kids, and they were so right! Trying to anticipate responses to new situations and unexpected changes, although sometimes impossible to do, really does help all of us. I can't say it is easy, though, because this goes totally against the grain of the hustle and bustle of daily life in America, not to mention the revved up pace of the holidays. We want to avoid meltdowns at all cost so that all of our kids can have the best Christmas and have great memories of this special time of year. We look forward to the future when we can all feel more comfortable and can be less structured, but for now it works.

We're all pretty excited to have a few days off and celebrate the birth of our Savior as a new and bigger family. The kids like to tell us of Christmas in Ethiopia and of Mariam (Mary) and Escabior (Jesus.) Their little accents sound so sweet and beautiful. In spite of the challenges and adjustment of life as a bigger family there is a different feel and dynamic to the preparations of Christmas this year. It's good. Some things are more difficult but the big picture is so much brighter, richer and deeper with Corinne, Ellyn and Turner in our lives.

Birthdays and More

2009-12-20T15:15:00.008-06:00

As promised from the post last month, here are photos of the kids building their fort. They added cardboard boxes to keep out the wind. I think there might even be a laundry line strung across the top of their window.

Thanksgiving. The kids said they did not have turkeys in Ethiopia. We had major discussions on who was going to eat the turkey legs because all three of our new kids wanted them!

Around our house, birthdays are ushered in with breakfast in bed. Madison turned 13. Wow, we have a teenager in the house!

Madison wanted to go to a Japanese hibachi restaurant for her 13th birthday.

We had a skating party for Madison, Ellyn and Corinne. Dustin's mom made her special doll cakes for the twins.

We were so honored that our new friends, Bahiru and Hiwot, joined us for the birthday party.

It was great to have family celebrate with us for the twins' first birthday in America.

A quick pic after the performance of our church Christmas play. Aren't they adorable?

Ellyn and Corinne's turn for their birthday breakfast in bed. They turned 8!

Sage is going to kill me when he sees this photo on our blog. I just couldn't resist snapping a picture of him as he helped the girls paint their fingernails. When he's not tormenting and pestering, he is a wonderful big brother.

Home Four Months Today

2009-11-14T16:54:00.002-06:00

It was four months ago today that we came home as a family of seven, greeted by family and friends at the airport. I will never forget the relief of seeing so many of those who had supported us every step of the way and how it felt to fall into the arms and embrace those we love. We were coming off the most emotional week of our lives and were so glad to be home. I remember stepping out through the front doors of the airport into the very hot and steamy night, almost like walking into a furnace. It was such a change from the beautiful and temperate weather we enjoyed while in Ethiopia.

I remember being afraid that Hailab Turner would not like riding in a carseat. We had help while in ET to translate and prepare Hailab for sitting in a car seat once we came to America. When we were loading up in the van to leave the airport, he got in and saw his carseat. He called it his special seat and got in and buckled up with great pride. Preparing him in ET really helped.

Funny how when we were waiting and preparing, it was hard to look to the future and imagine what life was going to be like. We did our adoption training and read books, but like most things in life, most of our learning has come by experience. We have made many mistakes in these first months home and wish I could re-do some of my responses to my children's behavior. Even when I knew not to take things personally, I did and sometimes still do if I am not careful. It's a good thing we get to wake up each day and start over. I thank Jesus for the opportunity to start fresh each morning and for the strength that only He provides in the midst of struggles and strife. I pray over all of our kids for Jesus to fill in the cracks that I leave behind when I lose my patience and don't parent the way that I want. I pray for protection for all of our children, that the enemy would not have any strongholds on them because of adoption. I pray especially that our adopted children know they are special and so dearly loved and that God has a beautiful plan for bringing them to us to be our children. Sometimes that plan seems a little confusing when they are grieving and missing their birth mom and Ethiopia in general. They really miss Ethiopia and that isn't something that I can fix. Time heals and we'll walk through our adjustment for as long as needed. It reminds me of this post from last September about God's timing. I think what I wrote in that post is still so fitting in this different season we are in now:

"So we wait. And we pray.

Thank you, God, for this time of waiting. Some days will be difficult, we know... Help us make the most out of this time and place a peace in a little person's heart in Ethiopia tonight. Help him or her to know that they will be a part of a family again. We trust you, knowing that you are working your perfect timing into this situation. We pray that it is you who is glorified and praised in the midst of our planning and preparation. Please don't let us ever forget that we, too, are orphans given a place in your family because of Jesus' amazing act of love and grace on a nasty, ugly cross. Amen"

Even as it is starting to get dark this evening, I hear the sounds of kids playing outside. We live on a farm and have a refuse pile of old, broken pallets. What a treasure to children with wonderful imaginations! All five of the kids have worked together to build a little house for themselves. It is made from all kinds of scraps and pieces of just 'stuff' they have found around the farm. There may even be a tool or two of Dustin's that he'll have to go and reclaim! It has a door and a window and I think they were painting it this afternoon. As soon as they have it finished, I'll take a picture and share it.

I wonder where we will be in four months from now. No matter what the situation or season, we'll be held safe in the Father's arms. And that's a good place to be.

Photos (Finally!)

2009-11-08T22:28:00.008-06:00

I have become one of those bloggers that used to frustrate me. You know, the ones who blogged regularly until they came home with their child/ren and NEVER blogged again! Come on! Just like Paul Harvey, we want to read the rest of the story!

I now have a better understanding of those bloggers. There is NO time!

Wow. Where do I begin. I have started this post a thousand times in my head. I promised myself I wouldn't go to bed tonight until I wrote something because once Monday starts, the whole week is a flurry of activity, chaos, rowdy kids with loud voices and homework!

A second part of my lack of posting has been the extremely difficult days we have walked through as a family of seven. I have struggled with wanting to be transparent for other waiting AP's and also for those that may be considering becoming adoptive parents. At the same time, our children have walked some hard, long, difficult days and I don't want to dishonor them by spilling the details of their actions and behavior as they are learning life in America as part of our family. It's been rough. It's been more than rough. But, we are in such a better place than we were two months ago. For the most part, the twins have almost given into the fact that I'm their mom and they really aren't in charge around here. At least they hesitate before arguing with me about every thing that comes out of my mouth! I may be stretching the truth a bit because they really have come a long way since our first days home in July. They have incredibly great manners and remember their please and thank you's more often than our bio kids. They love to joke and tease, especially Hailab Turner. They like routine and change is really difficult for them. They like knowing what is happening next. They even ask me sometimes, "What are we doing tomorrow? When we go to bed and get up, what are we doing the next day? When we go to bed and get up, what are we doing the day after that?

We've been home four months. The last three weeks have been completely different around the house in such a good and positive way. We are so thankful.

I've added pictures from this fall. Don't we look like one big happy family?!? In an effort to stay as transparent as possible in blogland, many of these pictures are great but I don't have photos of the difficult and painful days. And if I did, I wouldn't show them anyway. (I do have one great picture of Turner pouting. I just might use when he turns 16 or 21 or 30 for a good roast!)

We are glad to answer any questions anyone may have about our experiences. Our heart is to help others be more aware of the gift of adoption, and the ability we all have to help orphans in some way or another.

I will do my best to post before another two months fly by!

Good old fashioned roller skating!

Ellyn Yeabsira and Hailab Turner standing on Ethiopia on the large scale globe at the zoo.

My sweet sister, niece and Madison.

I love this picture!

It's good to grow old together. We met over 20 years ago.

Our small town festival. Our family always has a float in the parade.

Nanna kisses!

Carving pumpkins and roasting seeds. It was a great afternoon!

They wanted to race their bikes and asked me to say, "Ready, steady, go!" (Ready, steady go is their verson of ready, get set, go. It always makes me smile when they say it.)

Playing in the yard!

The four youngest kids set up lawn chairs for Dustin and me to watch them play football. Some were in coats, some in sweats and one with no shirt! Hilarious!

Corinne Meserat

Brothers

P.J. day at school. The kids dressed up each day as part of Red Ribbon Week. The girls kept telling me they were stomping out the drums in their school. (Drums, drugs... you know it sounds almost the same!) They weren't too sure about wearing their pajamas to school. It took a little coaxing. I bet they think America is pretty weird sometimes.

Trick or Treat!

Madison and her good friend. I have to say, I didn't know who Thing 1 and Thing 2 were at first. You know, from Dr. Seuss! I thought they were way too cute and so creative!

A funny story... our neighbor and I trade off driving our kids to school each week. One morning one of her girls was saying, "Trick or treat! Smell my feet!" One of the twins gave her a strange look and asked in her cute Amharic/English accent, "You want ME to smell YOUR feet?!?"

Melkam Enkutatash

2009-09-11T16:23:00.003-05:00

The kids got home from school today and I greeted them with "Melkam Enkutatash!" Luckily I pronounced it correctly and they knew what I was talking about! They were surprised that I knew about the Ethiopian New Year. I asked them what they did on Enkutatash and they said something to do with yellow flowers and a coffee ceremony. One of the twins said they eat doro (chicken) on Enkutatash, but the other two said no, they don't eat chicken on Enkutatash. They showed me how the kids wore drums around their necks and the girls wore dresses. I think maybe there was an exchange of coins or food.

I told them that we celebrate New Year's Day on January 1st. They asked what we do on that day. I went to the pantry and showed them black eyed peas. They said they eat them, too. They asked me, "What else?" I told them no school, no work and usually football on T.V. and good food.

I asked the kids what year it is in America and they answered 2009. I asked them if they knew what year it was now in Ethiopia. They again answered 2009, but I said, "No, do you remember what year it is?" They looked puzzled. I reminded them it was 2001 and today it is 2002 in Ethiopia. They gave me an ah-ha look as they remembered from Ethiopia!

Melkam Enkutatash!

Turning the Corner to Feel a Fresh, New Breeze in the Air

2009-09-10T08:52:00.006-05:00

Life is happening around our house. Some good, some rotten, some fantastic and some very, very normal stuff. Some days have been more difficult than I thought I could handle. Others have been filled with beautiful smiles and sweet sharings.

I really feel like we have turned a corner this week... one for the better. There has been an easier spirit around the house, smiles appear without guarded hesitation and laughter has been deeper and richer than ever before. One of our sweet Ethiopian children has struggled with their emotions and had lots of anger, sometimes raging, and major defiance. Understandable. A child. A hurting child. Sometimes a very confused child. (I have to admit it is very difficult to remember all this in the heat of the battle, I mean moment!) We watched as this sweet one started down a road of anger and discontent on Tuesday, we saw all the signs as the situation began to unravel. And yet they were able to use words and share tears and tell me what they were feeling, moving away from the normal anger response. I stopped what I was doing and we just sat in the grass. This child talked a little, but mostly we just sat together as I rocked this sweet one in my lap. Our child was able to recover and move back into the family happenings with cheerfulness. Amazing! Yes, we have turned a corner. One of our other children was able to talk about personal feelings with more freedom shortly after all this happened. I think they, too, sensed change in the air.

Even as tangible as this feels, I am trying not to set myself up for disappointment if we encounter more tantrums. But this beautiful change feels like a glorious spring day after a long, hard, cold winter. God IS good. God IS faithful. God has provided in so many ways and we thank Him for the good work He has done, is doing and will continue to do in the lives of all our children and in ours.

...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6

We have our first post placement visit today. Needless to say, our house doesn't look quite as spotless as it did when we had our homestudy. Funny how seven people in the house changes things!

African Thunderstorm

2009-08-16T16:45:00.008-05:00

I first saw this video when my dear friend Kristine posted it on her blog with a dedication to our family. I absolutely LOVE this version of Toto's 'Africa,' mostly because it sounds just like the rain on our roof when we were in Ethiopia. We were there just as the rainy season began. It rained every night and the days were clear and beautiful with the exception of one afternoon. And if you, too, love 80's music then this one will zing you back a few years!

BTW, Kristine and her husband have four amazing kids, three of which are from Russia. Several years ago God used Kristine's family to water the seeds of adoption He had placed in our hearts. She's always posting new stuff to her blog and I would encourage you to stop by and visit her!

First Day of School

2009-08-13T23:05:00.004-05:00

I cannot believe we've been home four weeks and the kids started school today. We now have a 7th grader, a 4th grader, two 1st graders and a Pre-K student. It was a great day. All the kids were excited about the first day of school. Hailab Turner went to school in the afternoon and then I picked them all up when school was over. The car was filled with little voices telling me all about the events of today all the way home. Truly a wonderful day!

I surprised myself today. As I was leaving Turner's class after dropping him off, I turned and had a lump in my throat. It really caught me off guard. We are starting to feel like family and the lump in my throat is such a good indication of all the good that is yet to come. Once more, praising God for the good things He is doing in all of our hearts!

Sadness and a Haircut

2009-08-11T00:31:00.004-05:00

Our two big kids were getting ready for bed while I ended a book and prayed with our three little ones. Up until today, the kids prayed in Amharic. They would pray and say, "Amen." several times during their prayers. They laughed at me the first time when one said, "Amen," and then I thought it was my turn and started praying. They tried to tell me they pray a little, then say amen, pray a little more, say amen, etc. They got a good chuckle over me!

Well, tonight... the kids all prayed in English and it made me sad. I almost wanted to stop them and ask them to pray in Amharic because it sounds so beautiful and sweet. Not that their prayers tonight weren't pure and childlike, it's just change. One that I wasn't quite ready for, but one that is inevitable. It made me sad.

On a lighter note, I took Hailab Turner to get a haircut this afternoon before school starts this week. I went to the barber shop and told the very kind Korean woman to cut it short. I didn't think a thing about it. Until I looked up from my magazine! Turner was a millimeter from being bald. I am very thankful he didn't see the shocked look on my face! We got in the car and Turner said, "Me no like haircut," and then grinned. He was teasing me, and yes, he did like his haircut!

Ending the fourth day in a row without a tantrum! Thanking God for the work He is doing in all of our hearts!

Roses and Thorns

2009-08-09T13:54:00.002-05:00

Roses:

-Bedtimes are still pretty smooth. The kids like the routine of a short movie after bath and pajamas, brush teeth, book, prayers and lights out. Thanking God for small accomplishments.

-We are working on our third day without a tantrum! (Sh... shouldn't say that too loud and jinx ourselves! ha) Dustin and I high-fived one another last night when all kids were asleep in bed, feeling encouraged by a second day IN A ROW without a meltdown! Praising God for the BIG accomplishments.

-Dustin got a completely unsolicited, "I love you" from one sweet little child last night at bedtime. He said it was wonderful!

-Giggles are contagious! How wonderful when any one of the five kids giggle. It is joyful and usually ends up causing others to join in the fun. Hearing our younger kids' laughter reminds us of great times when Madison and Sage were younger. As my mom would say, "It's all good!"

Thorns:

-The constant barrage of "Me no __________________." Fill in the blank with anything and it will fit into the current theme at our house. Me no eat. Me no brush teeth. Me no like. Me no swim. Me no boat (they love the boat.) Me no dress. Me no underwear. Me no watch movie. Me no THIS book. Me no car. Me no eat eggs (they love eggs.) Me no car. Get the picture? This is really our biggest struggle right now. We continue to use joking and mocking and it does help lighten the mood when a little person puts their foot down and begins with their current, "Me no..." It does get wearisome though. Dustin and I really try to stay positive and know it won't last forever.

-Dragging Feet! And this has absolutely nothing to do with adopted children, just children in general! Dustin and I have had to re-adjust to younger kiddos. We forgot how long it takes to simply load up in the car to go somewhere. Jeesh! I have had to watch the clock a little better and plan add time to whatever the schedule is just to get in the car and get seat belts on. It's getting better. Well, actually, Dustin and I are just getting better!

Praising God that there are more roses than thorns. All in all, each day offers more hope to getting into the groove of a new and improved, larger family. It's tough, it's a whole lot of work. But we are truly thankful!

Flowers? Children? Jesus Follower?

2009-08-07T10:49:00.008-05:00

"He who would have nothing to do with thorns

must never attempt to gather flowers."

--Unknown

I could expound on the many ways this quote speaks to me at this season in our lives, but I think I will leave it as is.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Me No Like, Me No Eat

2009-08-04T23:10:00.003-05:00

We hear this at EVERY meal from one particular member of our family. It doesn't matter what it is. It can even be something that she likes. It was getting very old. And on top of it, she always ended up eating everything on her plate. She just had to get her complaints out first.

So... Dustin started beating her to the punch when a meal was served. As we were putting plates on the table one night and saw her bottom lip push out, Dustin said with a mocking tone, "Me no like. Me no eat." A little brown-eyed girl looked up at him, wondering what he was doing. She even chuckled (a little bit.) It worked! Now at every meal, it has become a little bit of a game. We still see the bottom lip every once in awhile, but at least she doesn't push her plate away! Woo Hoo! One score for Team Parents!

We have also heard, "Me no school" from our littlest guy. He has said this many times since we've been home from Ethiopia. Today we went and toured the school. It just so happened that his teacher was working in her room. And the room is wonderful! It is every child's dream classroom! After just a few minutes, Hailab Turner was really enjoying himself. When we got in the car to leave I looked at him and said, "Me no school?!?" Turner's response was, "YES MOM! Yes, me school!"

Sometimes a little mock just does the trick!

Week Three in Pictures

2009-07-25T21:00:00.002-05:00

Our neighbor's dog, Sparky, came to visit. The kids loved him especially since he was so much smaller than Zeus, our Great Dane.

After a nearly traumatizing visit to our pediatrician, all was well at the park. Hailab froze when the doctor checked him over, but the girls were in complete hysterics. I told them before the visit that their doctor was very tall. They said, "Like Travis?" Many of you know Travis Norwood, one of the in-country staff and yes, he is tall! Our pediatrician was great with the kids. No poking, no shots, nothing painful. He was very gentle yet firm in his observations, not wanting to scar them for the next time they came to the doctor.

Our dear friend, Lynn Ann, allowed us to come and spend the afternoon at her house. One of the kids' friends recently went home with her forever family to California. The kids all know that their friend's new family has horses and have been asking about horses since we met them. Lynn Ann introduced them to curry combs, saddle blankets, bits, halters and horse shoes. They tolerated their ride on Shorty, the small horse, but their eyes were really on Cowboy, the big horse.

Lynn Ann's house is also the place to find turkey's, peacocks, dogs, cats, goats and yes, the occasional rattle snake. We waded in her pond and enjoyed brownies and watermelon for a late afternoon snack.

I love the kids' English. They use the word 'small' for anything little: a small push on the swing, shallow water (small water), small drink, small time finishing a movie (small more, Mom, please), small dog, small horse, etc.

Beamlak on Shorty

Yeabsira on Shorty

Sage on Cowboy

Hailab on Shorty

We all went to pick Madison up from church camp on Friday. All four kids were so happy to see her. She had a wonderful week and I am so thankful for her time away in such a beautiful campground, learning more about her Savior from others who love Jesus, too.

We went to the lake this afternoon and tried the boat out on the water for the first time in almost two years. We were unsure how the kids would like it, but after a little hesitation, all loved splashing and playing. They even asked for more when Dustin took us all for a pretty fast ride. I didn't take our camera and missed many great photo ops. We picked up hamburgers and ate at the park on our way home from the lake.

Dustin is putting the kids to bed as I finish up this post. Bedtimes are usually met with dragging feet, wanting to sleep in every body's bed but their own, and general anxiety/sadness/anger/teariness. I think it is the time of day when emotions are revisited, bodies are tired, and it's easy to become cranky. I don't expect bedtimes to get much easier for awhile as I think it will just take time. At least they wake up happy and cheerful, which is a wonderful start to the day. Not that they always stay that way, but at least we usually start off good!

The kids have also been asking about church ever since we came home. We are going to attempt church services in the morning. I am more worried about me than anyone else. We always had a hard time getting four of us off to church without being late... what will seven be like? Mom, don't answer that question!

Beginning Week Three

2009-07-20T21:13:00.009-05:00

It's hard to believe that we became a family of seven just two short weeks ago. Madison left for church camp this morning. The kids asked where she was when they woke up. I got out the calendar and showed them today was Monday and that Madison would be back on Friday. They asked me several times, "Madison go and then come? Yes? Madison go and them come home?" Then we counted the days and they were happy to know Madison would be home in four days. It's Mad's first time away for a week and I think I will miss her terribly! She was so excited to go and I pray it will be a fun and rich time for her. I am amazed at how big she is getting. She is such a wonderful helper with the kids. It's a little hard for her to not hold Hailab, but she understands how important it is for our new kids to look to Dustin and me to meet their needs physically and emotionally.

Dustin's parents invited us for dinner tonight. They cooked fish that Dustin's dad caught in a nearby lake. Dustin's parents also have a really pretty fish pond in their yard. The kids loved looking at and feeding the goldfish in the pond. When we were telling the kids we were having fish for dinner, Yeabsira pointed to the pond, made a slicing motion across her neck and pointed to her mouth. She was asking me if we were eating the fish in the pond. I assured her no, we were not eating the goldfish. It was pretty humorous!

Our biggest struggle today was again, battle of the wills. Simple requests like, "It's time to brush our teeth!" or "It's time to take a bath!" are often met with a pout and someone sitting down and refusing to move. Sometimes I am able to love the child through the pout/tantrum/meltdown and other times my own frustration gets the best of me. The times that I am able to quietly say, "O.K. Stay here if you like but we are going to do _______" often end up with the best results. A few things that were always met with resistance, like asking the kids to go to the potty before we get in the car or potty before we go to bed, are slowly easing up. It's a good feeling.

Our biggest joy today was unprompted kindness, a surprise kiss and a fun time on the bed (all of us except Madison) before reading a book.

Sage was such a ham when he was younger. It's fun to have another little ham in the house again:

A Few More Photos

2009-07-18T23:59:00.003-05:00

Saying goodbye to our amazing driver, Beki. We all miss him very much. The kids asked to see a picture of him tonight.

One of the three like our dog, Zeus. The other two squeal when he walks in their direction.

Cinderelli, Cinderelli... we watch it several times a day when the kids aren't out riding their bishkalets (bicycles)!

The last two days have been wonderful in comparison to our first three days home. Tantrums have decreased significantly. The kids are eating so well. We ran into the grocery story today and one of the twins saw radishes and asked to buy them. (Yuck! Radishes!) She said she liked them, so we will see. Either they ate radishes in ET or something that looked similar.

It's been an interesting week. One of my dearest friends was describing how it felt the day you wake up and you don't think of your kids as adopted, they are just your kids. That will be a great day. I so want to "feel" like family and yet I know I can't force it on me or them. It just takes time.

Almost everything is unpacked. My sister is here for the weekend and I think she did at least 10 loads of laundry yesterday. She also organized a menu for next week and helped me keep my head on straight long enough to purchase all the needed groceries. We are amazed at the food consumption around here. My goodness, I've never seen kids put so much food in such little tummies. Hailab has gained almost two pounds! A typical day includes several bananas, apple, peanut butter sandwich, eggs, toast, milk, casserole, salad, fruit salad. We really can almost set our watch to them saying, "I'm hungry" every two hours. My grocery budget requires a complete overhaul. But that is not a complaint! We are so glad to see them eat so well. One of the girls turned her nose up at a small serving of salad one evening. I asked her to take one small bite and then she didn't have to eat anymore. The next time I looked at her plate was clean and she said she liked the salad! I think it was the ranch dressing that she liked!

We're good. Not perfect. Not happy all the time. But happy a lot of the time and that means a whole lot to us.

Pictures in Reverse Order

2009-07-16T22:40:00.005-05:00

I loaded a few random photos from the last week. Then I realized blogger loaded them in reverse order and I am way too tired to fix it. (Those of you who know me best, know that this would drive me crazy, but hey, I'm learning to be flexible!)

The kids have been begging to go swimming since we were in ET. They saw the pool at the Hilton one afternoon when we were exchanging currency. We told them we would go swimming in America and they didn't let us forget it! Today's trip to the pool was our first venture out of the house and I was a little unsure any/all kids would have a meltdown in public. Sure enough, while getting into the car after leaving the pool, one kiddo had a full fledged screaming fit over a seat belt.

Our first night home. We had way too many toys available for the kids and they were overloaded. I think they fell asleep watching a Cinderella movie. (Again, much flexibility required on my part... I hate messes like this in the house! I think I'm beginning to sound a little OCD.)

Exhausted girls in the Denver airport.

An everyday sight on the streets of Addis.

A beautiful outdoor lunch at Addis Rodeo, a restaurant near our guest house.

Saying goodbye at the foster care centers. The care givers are really amazing. As painful as it was to watch them say goodbye, we loved seeing how much love was shared between our kids and those who took such good care of them in the Gladney houses.

A picture taken on a little balcony of one of the Gladney houses.

Sweet smiles at the guest house.

Waiting to meet our kids! Everyone was asleep but me.

So Glad to Be Home!

2009-07-15T11:24:00.003-05:00

We are home! We left for the airport in Addis at 7:00 p.m. Sunday evening or 10:00 a.m. CST. Get this... we arrived home at our house at 5:00 a.m. Tuesday morning. Just in case you are wondering, YES, IT WAS HORRIBLE! Our flight was late leaving Addis and our refueling stop in Rome took an extra hour. We arrived late in D.C. and so we missed our second flight. We sat in D.C. for over seven hours and finally caught our second flight. Our third and final flight was not to our original destination. Because our third flight did not get us to our original destination, we had an additional three hour drive home. Coffemom and her family were in Addis last week also, and I was so glad I had her to share in the long trip home. Her Marta is so very sweet and was beaming each time I saw her.

We finally arrived in our house at 5:00 a.m. on Tuesday morning. Over 40 hours of traveling. H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E!

Yesterday was tough. We read to have just a few toys for the kids and I thought we had limited the toys in their rooms. No, we didn't. I guess one toy per room would have been better because we spent the entire day yesterday hearing two little girls determining each toy as MINE. By last night, I was so tired of being a referee.

We all slept between 12 and 15 hours last night, which was great for everyone. Madison and I got up at 5:30 this morning and put away a bunch of toys, so today has been better. The kids English is so much better than we were expecting and that is a huge blessing. The most common words said at home so far are: mine, come, play, swing, eat, drink, juice, doll, glasses.

The kids have asked for bananas, peanut butter on bread, juice, milk, apples and grapes. They eat about every two hours. Travis told us in ET to keep plenty of food available as it would help with emotions (always helps with mine!) We've carried the advice through to here also. The other advice we received in ET was to be flexible. And being flexible here at home has been a life saver for my sanity.

The very best thing that we took with us to ET were little, cheapy picture albums filled with all the pictures we had of the kids from Gladney and other APs. Then we also put in photos of family, house, dogs and their school. They poured over the albums. They loved telling us their friends who were in the background of their pictures and they loved naming all of our family, "Grandmuzzer, Grandfazzer, Kusin, Sister, etc."

I kept a journal while in Addis. I hope to take excerpts and post them here in the next few days. Haven't looked at our pictures yet, and hope time allows for that soon.

This morning we pulled up a few blogs of the kids' friends that now live in "A-merr-i-ka." They loved seeing them. They are playing on the swing set right now, where it is a mere 108 degrees outside. Dustin's parents gave us a great swing set with Madison and Sage were smaller. It has a few swings, slide, stairs, climbing ropes and two "tree houses" mounted at the top. I turned my back for a few minutes and one of the girls was on top of the roof of a treehouse! Oh my!

Not to give the idea that all is a bed of roses at our home, we experience fits often, sometimes egged on by a sibling and sometimes for reasons we do not understand. We hold them close and hug them through it, even when they try to push us away. We know it is a part of the process and I tell myself often that it certainly not personal. It's just kids trying to cope the best they can. Sometimes we see beautiful smiles with unprompted 'thank you's' and sometimes we see some one of them take a toy and throw it across the room away from their sibling. Sweetness and goodness mixed with hurt, confusion and grieving.

Sorry for the scattered thoughts, but wanted to post something just to let everyone know we were home and alive!

Heading Home Tomorrow

2009-07-11T14:01:00.001-05:00

Another double post, one for the blog and the other for family and friends.

I sat and typed a long note, hit send and the internet connection ended. Ugh!

We are all good. Madison is getting her hair braided by one of the employees of the guest house. The three littlest kiddos are engrossed in Tom and Jerry. Sage is in bed with a fever. We are just hoping he feels better and we can get on the plane without any problems.

The "honeymoon" period ended last night. They are still wonderful, they are still funny, lively and joy-filled. It's just that they are starting to be a little more transparent. All of our training and reading is coming in handy as none of this has been a surprise.

We have enjoyed every second of our time in Ethiopia. I once heard someone talk about taking a trail ride on horseback. The horses are great on the trip out, clip-clopping along at a nice even pace. But once you turn the horses around, it's all you can do to keep the horses from trotting because they know they are heading home. I feel like a horse.

I don't want to take water and electricity for granted any more. But, with time I imagine it will happen. Every other day without electricity means every other day without running water. And when the water is running, you still can't drink it. Home sounds heavenly, just wish it didn't take so long to get there.

I should start moving the kids to bed. We are going to an International Evangelical church service in the morning. We are looking forward to it. We toured a church on Wednesday. On our way out the door to get in the car, the girls grabbed their head scarves. Women cover their head for prayer at church and it was so sweet to see our girls do what they know.

Much love from all of us. We can't wait to meet everyone at the airport. Even though we have been talking about it to the kids, I still think they may be surprised and a little fearful when they get to meet everyone. We have told them that family and friends will be there just to see them and will probably hug and kiss all over them. We told Hailab he will have to sit in a car seat in America. Instead of frowning, he beamed. He puffed his little chest out and said, "Special seat!" It was priceless.

Please pray for Sage, that he feels better tomorrow. I cannot imagine anything much worse than traveling for 30 hours when you feel rotten.

We love you all and again, can't wait for the kids to meet you. It's been a wild week!

Signing out from Addis,
Dustin, Nikki, Madison, Sage, Meseret (aka Beamlak), Yeabsira and last but not least, Hailab

Insert movie times and more without leaving Hotmail®. See how.

Alive in Addis

2009-07-08T10:16:00.002-05:00

Killing two birds with one stone... sending this to family/friends as well as posting on the blog:

WE ARE ALIVE! Today is the first day the modem has worked in our guest house. We have SO much to share.

The kids are wonderful! We expected the worst and have experienced as good as we could have ever hoped/prayed for. YOU WILL LOVE THEM! The placement (adoption term for hand-off) was extremely difficult with long, hard cries from the kids and then of course from Dustin and me. One of the guest house employees quietly joined us and spoke so softly and tenderly to the children and helped in the transition. His name is Cannon (sp?) and he didn't know us from Adam, and yet served us so generously by helping with the kids. I could write for days, but don't know how long the internet connection will stay up.

Ethiopia... no words. Simply no words. Dustin and I have raw, open sores on our hearts. I wonder if they will ever heal. We have seen things that shouldn't be. And yet, the people are very open, very kind and loving.... beautiful people.

Today was extremely difficult. We visited three Gladney houses, one for infants, one for toddlers and then the older kids home where our kids lived. It was all that Dustin and I could do to keep from openly sobbing as the children said goodbye to the care givers and friends who have been their family for the last 15 months. And the children in the homes... All beautiful, all deserving of a family to love them. I can't wait to share pictures. Dustin already picked out an older boy that he was ready to start paperwork to come back and get. (Dustin was so relieved when I told him that I knew that particular boy was in the process of being adopted, the boy just doesn't know it yet.) The care givers are amazing and you could tell how very much they loved our children. Each time our children went into one of the houses, the care givers squealed and loved and kissed and held each of them.

What else can I say without writing a book? The kids are amazing. They speak enough English for us to get by and have already picked up on so much. They love teaching us Amharic words. Haileb will sound an Amharic word out to us so that we repeat each sylable after him. Then he will change the last sylable and look at us and die laughing. He is a clown. Yeabsira is very sweet and loving as is Meseret. They are definatley siblings who are loving each other, caring for one another, sharing with one another and then the next minute whacking each other on the head. (We were warned in advance that the culture is very physical, so it was nice to have a warning the first time one whacked the other one. It bothers Sage terribly when they hit one another.)

There is just so much more. Dustin and I wake up each morning at 2:30 a.m. (5:30 p.m. time at home) and can't go back to sleep. We actually haven't minded much because it's the only time of day that all is silent and we get a chance to talk and reflect on all we have experienced and retell funny stories of all the kids. BTW, I never would have believed I could survive three days with little to no running water and little to no electricity. There is a huge shortage of electricity so the government shuts off all the power at least every other day. In addition a water pipe broke the morning we arrived and the guest house staff have hauled water up to our rooms in bucket so the toilets will flush and we can have bucket baths. When you are stinky and have yucky hair, cold water from a bucket for a bath really isn't THAT bad. We were so glad when the water was fixed last night. Madison almost did a halelujah chorus when she got to take a hot bath this morning (the electricity came back on, too!)

Our request, again, is for prayers for Friday when we meet Amarech. Today was so hard at the children's homes that we can't imagine what Friday will be like. Will the kids feel pulled in their loyalty to their birth mom and to their new family. What does a child feel in their shoes. Tears sting my eyes at the thought.

Love from Addis!

Dustin, Nikki, Madison, Sage, Meseret, Yeabsira and last, but not least, Hailab

We Leave Tomorrow!

2009-07-03T09:11:00.004-05:00

Gladney sent this last photo of the kids from ET last week. We leave tomorrow! We'll spend tomorrow night in DC and then leave for ET on Sunday morning. We think it's kind of cool that we'll spend the Fourth of July in our country's capital.

We will attempt to blog from ET, but also realize that the events of the week may be so overwhelming that we even forget we own a computer. That and the internet service may not be very consistent.

We arrive in ET at 8:00 on Monday morning, midnight on Sunday here at home. We are so ready to love on our kids and have all five together!

Multi Tasking Post - Need Your Help

2009-06-19T16:01:00.006-05:00

1. Thank You #1: A huge shout out to those of you who have shared pictures and even video (thank you Rebecca!) of our kids! They are priceless. It is a huge encouragement to me to do the same for other families when we get back. I really want to re-read all of our comments and send individual thank-you through comments on each of your blogs. I hope I find the time to do it because we really do thank you for taking a few moments to comment.

2. Travel Advice: Any travel advice from you seasoned adoptive parents? What did you forget to take with you to ET that you really wished you had? I have a pretty good packing list, but I know that in the excitement of the next few weeks I will miss something that seems little but could be of huge help on the trip. How did you survive the grueling trip home with your children? It looks like we are staying at the New Flower Guesthouse. Has anyone stayed there?

3. Thank You #2: I entered the blog world wanting to keep our extended family up to date on our adoption and journal a little bit for Yeabsira, Meserat and Haileb. I intended to stay rather anonymous out on the web, never really intending to become a blog stalker, to network with other families or even create amazing friendships with people I may never meet face to face. And yet is has happened, and more! I had read other's blog about their thankfulness about the adoption blog community and thought, "Oh, that's nice." Wow! I get it now! You guys are amazing! Jesus has taught me sweet little lessons through you all and I am so thankful! And as I said before 'Thank You' doesn't seem to express our appreciate and thankfulness for the support we have received. I never thought we would feel such love and caring as we watched our inbox fill up with post comments and emails as well as sweet comments from FB'ers. We are so thankful to share this road with so many others. It makes the tasks ahead feel so much less daunting. While we have read some really great adoption books, the blog community is such a source of support and encouragement. Sometimes it is hard to ask for help, but for the emotional health of our family, I will certainly look to many of you AP's who have experience and not attempt to go it alone.

4. Family Bonding: Last question... we've been encouraged by many to "hibernate" for a period of time upon our return home. While I know children and situations vary greatly (in our case - older child adoption of three kids), how long did it take for you to begin going in public and having visitors into your home?

We Passed!

2009-06-17T11:41:00.002-05:00

In God's perfect timing, we became a family of seven today.

It is with great joy and honor that we introduce to you to the newest members of our family...

Ellyn Yeabsira (left)

Corinne Meserat (right)

Haileb Turner (center)

This was the first picture we saw of our children.

And here's more...

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Thank you doesn't seem to fully express how we feel for the love and support we have received from the adoption blog world, family and friends.

Now off to check on other's blogs and make a fresh to-do list for travel plans!

Not Today... Tomorrow?

2009-06-16T11:49:00.001-05:00

Mary called to say that Gladney supplied the requested document to the judge today. However, Gladney supplied a copy and the judge requested the original. And if you are thinking the same as we did, "Why didn't they supply the original!!" Mary said it is common that they supply copies, so it was a little unusual for the judge to ask for the original.

So...

The judge will re-open the case tomorrow. And we pray that there are no more delays.

Dustin and I are thankful for all the encouragement. Patience is not a strength of mine, so I am choosing to use this time as an opportunity to grow.

God's timing is perfect!

Tomorrow?

2009-06-15T22:50:00.002-05:00

We're all wondering if tomorrow will be the day we pass court.

Madison and I walked this evening after dinner. While we were walking and talking she asked me if I would wake her up at 2:00 a.m. so that we could pray together for court. Our sweet Madison. God is good.

Tomorrow is Sage's 10th birthday and we'll start the day off with serving him breakfast in bed. Dustin started it years ago for one of my birthdays and the kids look forward to it every year.

Hoping we get to share three new beautiful faces tomorrow.

Not Today

2009-05-20T15:09:00.002-05:00

Sweet Mary called with the unwanted news that we did not pass court today. However, it is o.k. The judge is requesting an additional piece of information. My heart feels good knowing that the Ethiopian courts take the future of their children seriously.

Today's news really isn't what we hoped for, but we do go forward trusting that God is at work and His ways are not always our ways.

We are all four bummed. But it really is o.k. How many times have I read in other blogs that international adoption is not for the faint of heart?!? So true.

Our new court date is June 16th. That is Sage's 10th birthday!

A Family of 4 to a Family of 7 Tomorrow?

2009-05-19T21:02:00.002-05:00

It is so hard to believe that our court date is tomorrow! In some ways this last year has been so very long. In other ways, it seems like just yesterday we were nervously beginning this process hoping to adopt a child from Ethiopia. Hmmm, we love it that God had other plans for our family.

So as we sleep (or not sleep) tonight, our children's future will be discussed by some individuals that we likely will never meet this side of heaven. Our prayer is for God's beautiful and perfect will and timing. However, I keep reminding God that we really would love to pass court tomorrow.

We received a quick update on the kids today. They looked as if maybe it were morning and were just getting up and around. They had those sweet sleepy eyes. Moms, you know the ones I am talking about!

Thinking of all the other families with court dates this week!

Many, O Lord my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.
-Psalm 40:5

A Week in Pictures

2009-05-07T23:15:00.012-05:00

Less than two weeks until our May 20th court date!

Here's a little of life at our house recently. In no particular order:

New window treatment's for the girls' room! My mom and grandmother made them and we love them! They really help to put the finishing touches on the room.

Madison recently got out all of her American Girl stuff. She set up the doll bed, washed and ironed the doll bed sheets and organized all of her outfits and accessories to share with her new sisters. We ordered new AG dolls for Y and M. We hope they like them!

Now all we need are two sweet little girls to make the room complete!

For a last little trip as a family of four, we went to the Gladney Skittle Event at Six Flags last weekend. Sage has always wanted to try lobster and he got his chance during lunch at one of our favorite restaurants Papadeaux's.

We enjoyed a Texas Rangers vs. Chicago White Sox game during the weekend. We arrived at the field early to watch batting practice. (That's why the stadium seats are empty!)

Cole, Riley, Evyn, Madison, Anaka and Sage

We spent the evening at Six Flags with cousins and new friends. We loved that there were no waiting lines for the rides. The kids thought it was pretty cool to get to ride over and over without getting out of their seat.

Sage, Madison, Marta and Yordee

The highlight of our evening at Six Flags was meeting Ryan and Abby Brown, their daughter Marta and Ryan's sister Yordee. Ryan has sent the updates on our kids and Marta helped to translate our letters to the kids in Ethiopia. We were able to ask questions about our kids as well as hear Ryan and Abby's stories of God working in their lives. Truly a blessing.

Dustin grew up riding motorcycles and has always talked of buying a dirt bike ever since we were married. His 40th birthday is coming up and he purchased his birthday gift for himself... a 2006 Suzuki RM250. The bike was previously owned by Cody Elkins, a professional FMX rider.

This picture was taken just before he popped a wheelie. I really don't think I'll be riding his motorcycle again anytime soon. (I was kind and didn't post Dustin's injury pictures. He's had a couple of pretty good crashes along with some very sore ribs. Yes, he always wears a helmet... just not in this photo.)

Our soon to be 10 year old son getting ready for his first peewee baseball game. To say that Sage is passionate about baseball is an understatement.

Bedrooms, Easter and Amharic

2009-04-15T23:06:00.012-05:00

Here's a few pictures of some of the improvements we've made around the house. Y and M's room is chocolate and pink. The window treatments will look so cute when they are installed. After 2 1/2 months of waiting, Sage and H's bunk bed finally arrived. Madison's loft bedroom is painted in an adorable combination of guacamole/lime green and chocolate brown. We still have pictures to hang on the wall and odd and ends to finish, but these are a few 'in progress' pics.

Even though it is hard to see in the photo, we extended our kitchen bar to make an "L" shape and added new formica and a tiled backsplash.

Easter was fun but the rain limited our egg hunt to the indoors. We all thought out loud about how much fun Easter would be next year with all the kids together!

Sage took hunting very seriously and borrowed an extra bucket to hold his prizes.

Cousins Sage, Jack, Madison and Grayson

We were excited to find a book and cd titled Amharic for Adoptive Families. Some of you AP's may already have this great little resource. The author, Amy Kendall (an adoptive mom herself), has done a fantastic job of putting together basic phrases and key words in a small spiral book. The audio cd has been so helpful to get the emphasis just right on many of the words and phrases. Amy has books in other languages, too. A portion of the proceeds go to help children who are waiting for forever families.

Madison's Second Hospital Visit

2009-04-04T20:37:00.003-05:00

This time it was for an outpatient surgery to remove her kidney stone. We prayed it would pass on its own, but the urologist said the stone was just too big.

She was a champ and sailed through surgery and recovery. We had an excellent nurse, which made the procedure so much better. Madison is really bummed because she will miss a few track meets until she is released for sports.

Hair Day

2009-03-30T18:10:00.003-05:00

We received a picture of our girls this morning. (What a great way to start the week!) It brought a huge smile to our faces. Mary T. explained that the picture was taken on hair day, a day when the kids get their hair washed and styled. Just had to share a bit of the photo. This picture is of Y and M along with one of their friends. Less than two months until the court date!

Star Struck in Fort Worth

2009-03-19T23:43:00.005-05:00

Yep, that's me. Star struck. By Gladney folk, of course!

We were so glad to travel to Fort Worth last night for an Ethiopian meal at the Gladney Center. There are so many heroes and stars in the adoption community and it was so wonderful to get to meet a few of them. Stars like Rebecca, Jana, Lori and Jami. And also to see Eli and Rebecca again! Eli is fast tracking to rock star status himself as the "cover model" on a new Gladney video of Ethiopia.

And then there were the stars and heroes that we met like Belay Tafesse and his family, along with Travis and Joanna Norwood. We introduced ourselves to Belay and he knew right away who our kids were without us saying their names. This is a man who works with hundreds of people in Ethiopia and he knew the connection between our children and us. He sure knows how to make a person feel special!

And last, but not least, was the wonderful Mary T. Mary has been so completely professional, prompt, helpful and honest with every step of our adoption process. However, last night we saw her love and passion for Ethiopia's children in living color. She is the real deal. We researched agencies and all of our studies and reading led us to Gladney. We initially thought we wanted to work with more of a faith based agency, but are so glad that we get to share this adoption experience with the people of Gladney. To see Gladney staff tear up over the Ethiopian video really touched Dustin and me. These people work in adoptions every day and yet it doesn't feel like it is just a job to them. Sure, it's work and work isn't always fun but we saw hearts passionate for children to become loved by forever families.

So yes, we were star struck by those people with whom we share a common bond and heart for Ethiopia and for adoption.

Posting from the Hospital

2009-03-03T21:22:00.002-06:00

Crazy day today. Madison is in the hospital with a kidney stone. All of her symptoms led doctors to believe she had appendicitis. After a CT tonight, it's a kidney stone. We're waiting on pain meds and hoping she passes the stone tonight.

We were all prepared for surgery and even though a kidney stone is no walk in the park, we're thankful that Mad doesn't have to have surgery. We would be so thankful for any prayers offered on her behalf.

Thank you, God, for your love and peace in all things.

Gladney Update and Corrected Court Date

2009-03-02T22:16:00.002-06:00

Gladney sent an update on the kids today:

"Y, M and H are all doing well. They love attention and run up to visitors. They are also always excited to have their picture taken. They love to pose and smile for the camera. The girls make sure that their brother gets into the picture and is seen. They are all doing well in school."

We love hearing that the girls look after their brother. It warms our hearts.

Also, our actual court date is May 20th rather than May 19th. There was a little mistake in converting the dates from the Ethiopian calendar to ours.

Not sure exactly what this scripture has in common with this post, but I it comes to mind:

"Though the cherry trees don't blossom

and the strawberries don't ripen,

Though the apples are worm-eaten

and the wheat fields stunted,

Though the sheep pens are sheepless

and the cattle barns empty,

I'm singing joyful praise to God.

I'm turning cartwheels of joy to my Savior God.

Counting on God's Rule to prevail,

I take heart and gain strength.

I run like a deer.

I feel like I'm king of the mountain!

--Habakkuk 3:17-19 (MSG)

We Have a Court Date

2009-02-25T12:08:00.002-06:00

May 19th is the day.

If we pass, we travel three weeks later. Possibly around the week of June 8th, which happens to be Dustin's 40th birthday. Hopefully we are celebrating in Ethiopia!

Praising God for His perfect timing in all things.

One Month of Waiting for Our Court Date Includes...

2009-02-21T22:56:00.004-06:00

One month of re-arranging bedrooms.

One month of painting shades of pink, chocolate and avocado green in various rooms in the house (not all in the same room!)

One month of remodeling a bathroom to make more room.

One month of extending our kitchen bar so we can add more stools.

One month of waiting for bunk beds to arrive.

One month of staring at three little Ethiopian faces many times a day.

One month of sharing their photograph with anyone and everyone.

One month of guessing when we will be assigned a court date.

One month of massive closet/cabinet/drawer clean-out.

One month of shopping for undies, socks, toothbrushes and guessing clothes sizes.

One month closer to becoming a family of seven!

H Turns Five Today

2009-02-11T07:07:00.003-06:00

Happy 5th Birthday H! We woke up this morning celebrating this day for you. Aunt Shelley sent an email early this morning and was the first to wish you a happy birthday.

Our hearts have fallen head over heals in love for you Sweet One. We talk of you and your sisters often. We are busy painting bedrooms and getting the house ready. We ordered bunk beds for you and Sage to share a room. He is super excited.

We are thankful for you. We are thankful for the day you were born. We are thankful for the day when we can meet and become family. Happy Birthday!

We Pray to the Same God

2009-01-26T21:02:00.008-06:00

Long Post Warning!

I have a to-do list a mile long, school is canceled tomorrow because of today's ice storm, the dog needs to be fed, but all I really want to do is put into writing what happened this morning.

For a little background: When we started the adoption process last June we saw a little boy on Gladney's Bright Futures page. Even though Gladney is changing some things about older child adoptions, previously they posted several pictures of older Ethiopian children on their site. During one of initial phone calls with Gladney, we were even given a little bit of this boy's information. He was/is a doll! The funny thing was, I was not drawn to him like I expected to be. I think we even pictured ourselves adopting a son, but something in my heart paused, not allowing my feelings to grow for this sweet thing. It really puzzled me, because this was totally out of character for me. We knew it would be several months before we were approved, so we chose to keep this little guy in mind and just see what happened.

Fast-forward to November. We were nearing wait list status and still had this eight year old boy on our minds. Not knowing if we were to pursue his adoption or not, we decided to call our caseworker and see if he was still available. If he wasn't, then that would answer our question. I sent Mary an email inquiring on a Thursday afternoon. I got an email from her on Friday and she asked if we could visit by phone the following Tuesday. Ugh! I would have to wait a whole weekend to find our answer!

Mary called on Tuesday and I proceeded to ask her about the sweet boy. She said she had a little something different she wanted to discuss. Because older children are harder to place she had an unusual circumstance. She continued by saying that three siblings were available and would we be interested? I was stunned. My immediate, down deep reaction was, "Yes!" But of course, I had to call Dustin. I thought I knew what his response would be, but I certainly had to ask him first. She was only able to share the gender and ages and other than that we would have to wait the normal time frame to be offered an official referral. Our homestudy only approved us for one or two children, so we would have to re-do some of our paperwork if we wanted to pursue the three siblings. If we were not interested in adopting three children, then we could continue as planned.

Dustin's immediate "yes" response confirmed what I felt in my heart. Our paperwork was updated for three children and then we had to just wait. We were officially on the waitlist on January 7th. On January 21st, Dustin and I were getting in bed and were talking how long we thought the wait would be before we could find out more information about the siblings. I told Dustin I would give it until the middle of March before I would start "harassing" Mary for information!

To our total surprise, Mary called the next day with the referral and we finally got to see three beautiful faces, Y, M and H. We knew immediately that these were the children God had planned for us. I realized why I had the pause in my heart for the 8 year old boy. While I pray a family scoops him up, I knew the siblings were the reason God had not allowed my heart to fall for him.

Our last post announced our referral and we have been overwhelmed by comments on the blog, on facebook, by email and phone calls. The adoption blog community is truly amazing! One of the first comments came from coffeemom. She thought she may have met the twins when she was in Ethiopia last May adopting her sweet Gabriel. I sent her our referral picture to see if she recognized them. Yep, she had fallen for the twins and shared several photos with us! What a blessing. And since I hate filing through a mass of photos, I thought she was such an angel to offer to do this for us. Coffeemom sent the pictures in a few separate emails, but it looked as if I didn't receive all that she sent. I was happy nonetheless and didn't dare want to be presumptuous and ask, "Was that all?" So I didn't. At least not for two days.

Then I got to thinking. If these are some of the only pictures we will have of the kids before they are adopted, it is o.k. to ask. And coffeemom, being an adoptive mother herself, will surely understand. So I sent an email last night asking if she had originally sent more than the four emails I received last week.

I opened my email this morning, and sure enough, there were three more emails with pictures that she sent, but for some reason didn't get to me. And one of those emails included coffeemom writing about meeting Y, M and H and how she fell for the kids (not realizing they were siblings) and especially fond of Y. In fact, coffeemom was so taken with Y that she inquired about her last June (the same month we started the adoption process) to she if she was available. When she found out that Y had two siblings, coffeemom said she was heartbroken that they could not adopt three more kids. She began praying for the kids, wondering if anyone would ever adopt three older siblings.

Looking back, I believe God was orchestrating details and events that would bring Y, M and H to our family. There was a reason why I didn't become emotionally attached to the first little boy last June. God was preparing our hearts for these sibilings. Coffeemom was praying for them. We were praying for our children that we didn't know yet. We were praying for God to show us if we were to adopt a little boy, or did He have other plans for us? Had I hesitated to ask for the remaining pictures from coffeemom, I don't think I would have ever known this part of the story. And coffeemom would have thought I received the emails and didn't comment. So glad I asked!

I expressed my surprise to someone the other day about how God showed Himself in a situation. My friend told me, "Honey, why are you so surprised? We pray to the same God!"

I was reminded of these words today when this story unfolded. We pray to the same God and He is Wonderful. I thank Him for allowing us to see glimpses of His hand in our lives and in our adoption process.

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG)

Referral!

2009-01-22T22:49:00.003-06:00

We were shocked to receive a phone call from Mary this evening with our referral! We've been on the phone all evening with family sharing information and pictures of three beautiful children that stole our hearts with the first picture. Yes, three. Two sweet twin girls who recently turned seven and their four year old little brother.

Dustin and I have said many times that had we started this journey thinking we would adopt three children, we never would have had the nerve to start. God has given all of this to us in baby steps and we feel His love and care in matching these three children with our family. We are humbled at the thought of becoming their parents.

They have the sweetest smiles and our little guy has big, beautiful brown eyes. They are precious. Simply precious.

The Love of a Sister

2009-01-15T22:52:00.002-06:00

Came across this on another blog this evening, and as heart breaking as it is, I wanted to post it here also:

...To Love Them

2009-01-11T13:23:00.003-06:00

A quick post about dinner last night at the Queen of Sheba Restaurant. We had such a great time (so fun that I forgot to take any pictures!) Adoptive families gathered to welcome home sweet Eli. He is such a beautiful baby. There were tons of families that came, many that I only know of through blogs, so it was great to actually meet moms, dads and kids. The restaurant was so busy that extra help was called in to serve tables. A young man (H.) and his wife helped as waiters. H. easily engaged us in conversation and asked about our family. We learned that he was adopted from Ethiopia when he was 14. When we told him we were adopting, we asked if there was one thing he could share with us as an adoptee that would help our kids. He praised his mom for driving hours to the nearest Ethiopian restaurant, in addition to other things, to help him and his brothers stay connected with their heritage while they were growing up. He said keeping their culture alive was very important. The second thing he said was, "To love them." He assured us that the adoption process and transition is not easy, parents make mistakes, but adoption is good and God is faithful. H. said that when he tells people he is from Africa, the first things that usually come to a person's mind is desert and starving kids. He said while there are deserts and there are starving children, there is still so much more to his beautiful country. He gave Dustin and me good things to think about and discuss as we prepare for the future. (I would love to share more of H.'s story, but I didn't ask his permission and don't want to assume that it is o.k. He and his wife were absolutely delightful and shined the love of God with genuineness and beautiful transparency.)

Delicious food, wonderful company and lots of new friends. Thank you God!

We're on the Wait List!

2009-01-07T17:57:00.003-06:00

We were very excited to get the email today from Mary telling us we are officially on the wait list. Woo Hoo! The kids squealed when they read the title of Mary's email. Sage ran out the door to tell Dustin.

We are approved for up to three children and have requested either gender between the ages of 4 and 8. Sage is nine and it is recommended that we stay in birth order AND we so do not want to do diapers again. Don't get me wrong, we LOVED the toddler stage... just don't want to do it again.

Thank you, God, for patience during the paper chase and especially for the patience needed during the coming months...

Merry Ethiopian Christmas

2009-01-07T17:00:00.001-06:00

Ethiopia is one of the oldest nations in Africa. It still follows the ancient Julian calendar, so Ethiopians celebrate Christmas on January 7. The Ethiopian Orthodox Church's celebration of Christ's birth is called Ganna. It is a day when families attend church.

After returning home from NM, we had a wonderful Christmas celebration with Dustin's family. Dustin's sister and brother-in-law have four children, and our kids have a ball when they all get together. Can't imagine what it might be like next year!

Dustin's Mom and Dad

Dustin's Sister and Her Family

Papa and Mema with their Six Grandchildren

My mother-in-law is a great cook and always makes a special Christmas dinner followed by a delicious dessert or two. This year was chocolate tarts and homemade cream puffs with a raspberry cream filling. Yum!

Christmas, Snow & I-171H

2008-12-30T13:49:00.007-06:00

We spent part of our Christmas break in New Mexico and it was beautiful! The snow made everything feel clean and pure as if everything were right in the world. (The snow was deep enough that we didn't have to see the yucky, muddy slushy snow--just the sparkling white stuff.) One afternoon when we were all sitting in the snow preparing to take a group picture, nine deer came down the path near our cars and cabins and walked toward us. It was a great few minutes admiring the gentle animals.

Our little cabin was perched on the side of a hill and offered a gorgeous view from the front porch. Snow skiing was great, but the sledding was a little painful on the egos. A few of us ended up with bruises in all sorts of places!

We returned home last night to find our USCIS Form I-171H in the mailbox! Hooray! I quickly got it notarized and sent off to Kate at KBS Dossiers today. Hopefully we are officially on the waiting list in the next few days.

Hoping each of you had a wonderful Christmas. Happy New Year!

Two Bits of Info to Share

2008-12-20T20:41:00.007-06:00

I read a recent post by Tom Davis and thought I would share it. You can read it here or here:

What do you get an orphan for Christmas?

In the U.S., we ask the question, "What do you get for the person who has everything?" Let's turn that around... "What do you get the child who has nothing?"

At first, you might think of basic necessities like food or clothing. Perhaps you'd even think about toys or a bike.

Over the past decade of working with children who have less than nothing, I can tell you this: What an orphan wants for Christmas is for another human being to express the lavish, extravagant, and unconditional love of Jesus to them. They want--like all children do--to know that they are special and chosen and loved.

Would you like to give this gift?

I have seen thousands of orphans lives transformed through relationships built with their U.S. sponsor. When you give yourself to a child, it is something unique and personal. It does not need to be shared with others. And it is cherished above all other gifts I have seen.

I've also watched thousands of sponsors transformed into the hands and feet of Jesus--through prayer, letter writing, short-term missions, and orphan advocacy.

It's more than sponsorship. It's how you give the gift of yourself and your family's love to a child who longs to know what it feels like to be loved.

If you would like to start this process with me and Children's HopeChest. Go to this link for more information and to sign-up online.

It will be the best Christmas present you give this year.

Also, we were so excited to learn that our friends, the Bottomlys, wrote a book that will be published in March. How cool is that?! The title of their book is "From Ashes to Africa." More information on the book here. Amy's blog about their adoption of Silas offered tons of information and insight when we were in the decision making process. Can't wait to get a copy of the book!

Welcome Eli!

2008-12-02T08:35:00.002-06:00

After months and months of waiting, the Winters passed court! Tons of us in the adoption blog world were refreshing our computers every so often until the good news was posted yesterday. Introducing Eli....

Thankfulness Tag

2008-11-25T21:49:00.003-06:00

Joy tagged me with five reasons to be thankful. So, here goes:

1. My sweet husband who not only tolerates my many emotions, but loves me regardless. We make a pretty cool team and I am so thankful he asked me to marry him on a summer evening in 1991.

2. My great kids! Madison and Sage show me everyday what God's unconditional love looks like. Having them makes me want to be better tomorrow than I am today, each day.

3. My family. Each person in my family has helped shape me and mold me at some point along the way. I am so very thankful that God placed me into the family that He did, for each person that makes up the very colorful and wonderful family that I am a part of.

4. My friends. One in particular. How she saw something in me when there wasn't much to see. How she always encourages me and mentors me and exemplifies a truly godly woman, wife and mother. She always brings out the best in me. She is a mom to five outstanding kids that radiate God's love in so many ways and places. I thank God for friendships.

5. Hope. I am so thankful for hope. I am so thankful for the hope that Jesus placed into my heart that someday I get to worship him face to face in spirit and in truth. I am so thankful for the hope that this life, with all of its joy and sorrow, isn't as good as it gets. The best is yet to come.

6. The part of our family that lives in Ethiopia right now. I thank God for the child/children God has planned for our family.

I am tagging:

Happy Thanksgiving!

Meet "Our Kids"

2008-11-25T21:41:00.002-06:00

Russ Weir put this video together of the kids at Kebebtsehay Orphanage in Ethiopia that Red Letters Campaign is sponsoring. For those of you who have read some of my previous posts, this is it! This is what it is all about. Enjoy their smiles! And there are still plenty of kids to sponsor if you are interested.

Rise Expected in Ethiopia Orphans

2008-11-22T23:34:00.003-06:00

Found this article. Hard to picture Sage or Madison as the head of a household, but by God's grace they were born in the U.S. and not in Ethiopia. 225,000 households run by children by 2010?!?

Ethiopia to see sharp rise in orphans running households: NGO

Nov 7, 2008

ADDIS ABABA (AFP) - Ethiopia will by 2010 see a four-fold increase in the number of orphaned children aged between nine and 19 who are heading families due to AIDS, poverty and conflict, a local NGO said on Friday.

Some 225,000 households will be run by children, up from 77,000 in 2005, Addis Ababa-based African Child Policy Forum (ACPF) said in a report.

"This is going to be an explosive problem," said Assefa Bequele, the agency's director.

"In some households, the oldest child is also the principal care-giver to a terminally-ill parent," said the report.

Ethiopia is one of the world's poorest countries. The government estimates that 1.5 million Ethiopians are infected with HIV, while the World Health Organization says nearly 2.8 million are infected.

More Sponsorship Info

2008-11-15T19:01:00.002-06:00

Here's a new video from Children's Hope Chest of their recent trip to Ethiopia. Check here for more information on sponsorship.

Sponsorship Info

2008-11-12T17:08:00.002-06:00

Anyone interested in sponsoring an orphan in Ethiopia? Anyone interested in visiting your sponsored child on a yearly trip with a community of people also sponsoring orphans in the same orphanage? How cool does that sound?

I wrote a little about it here, but late-breaking details at Amy's blog! Go take a look and see if this is something where God would call you to jump in and be involved!

We are pumped! Not only are we excited about adding to our family by way of Ethiopian adoption, we are so happy to connect to other children who will grow up in Ethiopia and be a part of loving them and serving them through sponsorship.

Update: And go take a look at Joy's post on sponsorship. I love the way she shares on this same topic!

Bad Basketball Behavior

2008-11-11T19:05:00.007-06:00

Madison had a basketball game this afternoon. I saw something at her game today that made me cringe as a mom.

The opposing team's coach was young, possibly his first teaching job out of college. During the first half of the game (when his team was ahead) he became frustrated at his players. Remember, they are sixth grade girls around the ages of 11 and 12. The coach got mad, stood up from his chair on the sidelines, turned around and raised his clipboard over his head and slammed it on the chair. I was appalled.

A few minutes later was a break between quarters. He gathered his players around him on the side of the court and proceeded to scream at them, with gestures and hand motions to match. I could tell he was screaming because I could hear him from where I was sitting on the opposite side of the gym among all the commotion of the crowd.

Later in the game he threw his pen down with enough force to shatter it across part of the gym floor.

Am I over-reacting here? I don't really like to see high school coaches act like this, but their kids have at least had some experience playing the game. These are young girls just learning how to make plays and work together as a team! What could they have possibly done wrong to warrant such extreme and outrageous behavior from their coach?

So, I wrote a letter to his principal. It was a polite letter and stated the facts of the young man's behavior. The goal of my letter was not to criticize as much as it was to encourage this young educator to mature in his coaching skills and choose more age-appropriate behavior. Personally, I would have loved to have written a really nasty letter, but refrained because I really and truly want this young man to become a good coach, a good teacher and a good mentor to his students.

I realize the principal may throw my letter into file #13, but at least I tried.

I Voted

2008-11-04T22:34:00.003-06:00

The kids' classes held mock elections this week. Sage wore a VOTE NOW t-shirt to school today that we bought at Old Navy for $1. During our morning carpool, all kids were voicing their opinion on how today's election would end. Madison said is was not fair that kids didn't get to vote. I assured her that she will be 18 soon enough! Everywhere I went today, conversations were buzzing with anticipation of the vote. I like that word... vote.

And as our kids headed off to bed, we told them how we will support, honor, uphold, respect and pray for our new president-elect. Our vote did not result in a win for our candidate, but nonetheless, we still exercised our right to vote. And that is a precious thing. I hope our kids always know what a honor and privilege we have as U.S. citizens to be a part of the democratic process. We are so thankful to have been born in a country where we choose our leaders. We are so thankful to live in the United States of America.

Kolfe Orphanage, Addis Ababa

2008-10-28T22:23:00.003-05:00

Tom Davis' most recent blog post is about Kolfe Orphanage in Addis Ababa, home to about 130 boys . Many families adopting through Gladney visit orphanages while in Ethiopia and I have heard this particular orphanage mentioned several times. However, I had no idea the extent of poverty that these young men experience daily. Please read more about Kolfe and their immediate needs on Tom's blog.

In addition, I found this video with a few more pictures of Kolfe.

Nachos Anyone?

2008-10-28T20:48:00.005-05:00

Hey, Madison here. When you saw the pictures you were probably thinking what the heck do they do with that thing, plow the fields !?!? Ha Ha Ha Just kidding :) Our neighbors own the donkey that lives in the pasture across the road. Her name is Nacho. We're not sure where her name came from, but my two year old cousin seems to like it. My cousin can't quite pronounce her words right sometimes and when she says Nacho it comes out "Na-noche.'' It is pretty funny. Nacho will come up to the fence and start braying until someone hears her and comes to give her a treat. Luckily I saw her tonight before she started that honkin noise of hers. So I just went inside and got some carrots for her. One thing that is really weird about Nacho is that she LOVES bread.

Red Letters

2008-10-25T15:11:00.004-05:00

Dustin and I recently read Red Letters by Tom Davis. Powerful book. One of the quotes that I underlined in the book is from an eighteenth-century English philosopher named Edmund Burke. He said, "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men (and women) to do nothing." I hope to read his book Fields of the Fatherless next. (My current read is The Connected Child.)

Amy Bottomly's recent post gives information about the opportunity to sponsor kids in Ethiopia through Tom Davis' organization Children's Hope Chest. Tom recently returned from a trip to Ethiopia where they were assessing orphanages to see where they can come alongside and support the orphanages and the orphans individually.

Amazing Song, Amazing Singer

2008-10-24T22:48:00.002-05:00

This video makes me smile and I hope it does the same for you! Dustin's aunt sang this song at our wedding 16 years ago. I loved it then and I love it now.

Weekend Dinner at the Queen

2008-10-22T21:04:00.003-05:00

Over the weekend we ate dinner at the Queen of Sheba with Dustin's sister, brother-in-law and their four great kids. Sage was so pleased when the owner, Mimi, recognized him from our last visit. Mimi said she remembered him because of how well he ate. The lamb dish is his favorite. Madison is still coming around to the injera. She likes it but she doesn't love it.

Dossier Authenticated

2008-10-20T23:24:00.004-05:00

Kate from KBS Dossiers sent an email today saying that our dossier has been authenticated. All we are waiting on is our CIS fingerprint appointment on October 28th and then the hallowed I-171. With the approval of CIS, we will officially be placed on the waiting list.

Madison and Sage both prayed for their brother or sister tonight, that they would sleep well and wake up to a beautiful morning. How reassuring to know that God has the exact child/ren in mind for our family!

Tagged

2008-10-14T20:01:00.011-05:00

7 Random and/or Weird facts about us:

1. Our first date was on 12/30/88. Our second date was on 12/31/88 with a first kiss at midnight. (We don't want our kids kissing on their second date! Maybe we just won't let them date. Yeah, that's it. We won't let them date.)

2. We've owned 11 dogs (I think) since we've been married. We currently have three that we live with (Dustin would say tolerate.) We've had way too many cats to count and currently have two that live in a barn. Don't worry, we haven't actually killed any dogs. They just die of natural causes around here. Natural causes i.e. country roads, fast drivers. Get the picture?

3. Two concerts Nikki attended in high school were Bon Jovi and ZZ Top. Two concerts Dustin attended in high school were Van Halen and Motley Crue (does anyone really need to know this!?)

4. We've lived on a farm for 13 years, which is funny because Dustin's dreams were to move to Vail, CO, to be a ski instructor while Nikki's dreams were to move to Austin, TX, to be a school teacher.

5. Nikki has always wanted to travel to Australia. Dustin has always wanted to visit NYC for a very extended vacation. Think months.

6. We are avid Dave Ramsey fans. We visited his office in Nashville, TN a few years ago, and sat with him in the studio during a live radio show. He was so cool! We loved how he circled up some of his office staff prior to the show and asked for someone to pray for him. Dave looked at Dustin and asked him to do it. Dustin's favorite Dave quote is, "Live like no one else so that later, you can live like no one else." Our kids have heard it a million times!

7. Nikki's always wanted a tattoo but is too chicken to get one. Dustin has always wanted a Yamaha YZ250.

So in return, I am tagging:

Bread of Life

2008-10-13T22:07:00.001-05:00

(I wrote this post two days ago, obviously in quite a reflective mood. Today, I re-read it and it's a little deep and I am tempted to delete it. But maybe a year or two from now, I will be glad I put it in writing. Read on if you like, but don't feel that you must. -NS)

I was reading a lesson this morning about the hungry crowd in John 6. Jesus provided for a tremendous crowd with a little boy's lunch of five loaves and two fish. Common story, heard it as a child, studied it as a teenager, taught it to kids at VBS. (I remember wondering as a kid how God multiplied the lunch. Did he keep replacing fish in the bottom of the basket and every time the disciples reached in, there was always plenty? I have also wondered if the phenomenon was noticeable or did the new fish and bread just appear quietly? Hmm.) This time reading through the scripture, it was through the lens of adoption.

Then Max Lucado smacked me with this question, "What can we learn from Philip's response? What was the larger obstacle for Philip: the lack of food or the costs involved in feeding such a large crowd?"

I couldn't help but ask myself the same question rephrased, "What is the larger obstacle: the great number of orphans or the costs in providing for so many children?"

"What is the larger obstacle: the situation itself, or the fear that Jesus will not provide for the situation?"

Some situations seem so impossible, so out of reach. Some days as a mom I question myself if I will be a good mom to three or four kids when I struggle with two at times. Jesus knew He would provide lunch for the crowd even before He asked Philip about it. Jesus knows we will face obstacles that appear to have no solutions and Jesus wants to provide.

When we were contemplating adoption and the equation kept coming up short in timing and resources, Jesus knew and He wanted to provide. I look back at all that we struggled with to come to the decision to adopt. At times we were looking to ourselves to provide for an adoption, much like Philip. And yet God provided in His perfect time, giving a greater amount of glory to Him than if we had attempted this on our own strength and resources. His glory is our prayer.

From Max's book In the Eye of the Storm he writes about this passage in John:

"Don't miss the contrasting views. When Jesus saw the people, he saw an opportunity to love and affirm value. When the disciples saw the people they saw thousands of problems.

Also, don't miss the irony. In the midst of a bakery --- in the presence of the Eternal Baker --- they tell the "Bread of Life" that there is no bread.

How silly we must appear to God.

Here's where Jesus should have given up. This is the point in the pressure-packed day where Jesus should have exploded. The sorrow, the life threats, the exuberance, the crowds, the interruptions, the demands, and now this. His own disciples can't do what he asks them. In front of five thousand men, they let him down.

"Beam me up, Father," should have been Jesus' next words. But they aren't. Instead he inquires, "How many loaves do you have?"

The disciples bring him a little boy's lunch. A lunch pail becomes a banquet, and all are fed. No word of reprimand is given. No furrowed brow of anger is seen. No "I-told-you-so" speech is delivered. The same compassion Jesus extends to the crowd is extended to his friends."

Forgive me, Jesus, when I tell you through my thoughts and actions that there is no bread and yet you are preparing a banquet.

-NS

Adoption Video and a Loving Mother

2008-10-11T18:53:00.005-05:00

This is one of the first adoption videos I found last summer when Dustin and I were in the decision process. It is a video of the McConnell family adopting three boys, two are brothers and then another unrelated boy. Tears flow every time I watch it... the boy's mother in Ethiopia, her smiles for her sons and then when one of them looks up at her, as if to ask, "Is this o.k.?"... I lose it. I really cannot imagine what it would be like to sit with your mother and look at a picture album of your new family. If you have a chance to watch it, you'll know what I am talking about.

Family Photo

2008-10-11T18:18:00.004-05:00

Dustin's parents recently gathered everyone together for a family photo session. This is the four of us with Dustin's mom and dad, Butch and Jolene. I purchased the copyright for this one image to have Christmas cards made for our family business. I wish I had all of the other pictures on disc to share, including Dustin's sister and her family!

Happy Birthday Mom!

2008-10-03T20:20:00.005-05:00

A huge birthday shout out to my sweet mom, Anna. I know, we don't look much alike. Never would have guessed we were related, right!? Happy Birthday Mom. I love you.

Their Walk by Faith

2008-10-03T19:37:00.006-05:00

Wanted to share about a family with three biological children and adopted twins that came home from Ethiopia in April.

Their August 14th post is a shocking reality check and a hard read, but ends with hope and promise. Isn't that what adoption is all about? Whether it is orphans in a foreign country, orphans in the U.S. or any of us as followers of Christ who were orphans at one time and by grace have been given a home in Jesus?! Hope and promise.

Their big decision was posted on their blog yesterday. But please feel free to read their posts in between!

Why Adopt?

2008-10-03T00:14:00.003-05:00

Why adopt? A few reasons pictured here:

Interview with Belay and Yordee

2008-10-01T20:30:00.009-05:00

Belay Tafesse is one of Gladney's in-country representatives. He and others from Gladney and the Ethiopian government are traveling in the U.S. We were so sad that we were unable to attend a dinner at Gladney's Fort Worth office last night where Belay and other guests shared a traditional Ethiopian meal with adoptive families. A channel in north Texas aired an interview this morning with Belay and Yordee Brown. Yordee was adopted from Ethiopia when she was seven.

Time and Timing

2008-09-28T23:32:00.013-05:00

In light of the great waiting game we have ahead of us, I am often reminded of this quote that I heard Beth Moore share a few years ago:

Timing is more important to God than time.

(Beth credited a pastor by the name of Adrian Rogers as the original author of the quote.)

Dustin and I waited a very long time to make the decision to adopt and I often wondered why the delay. We obviously felt God's calling to reach out in some way and really felt the stirring of adoption for our family, and yet doors were not opening in a way to allow us to step forward. We attended two different adoption seminars and still nothing, no clear "GO" signal. I was confused. Why would God put something on our hearts and not make the way seem clear. Did we go ahead with this life changing event just trusting God would work out the details? And yet as anxious as I was (Dustin was a little more hesitant at times.) to get started, we did not have that inside peacefulness that said to our hearts, "It is time."

So we waited.

A year went by.

We waited some more. We contacted friends and family who had been adopted or knew someone adopted.

We waited some more. I worried that if we did not move on this calling that God would see it as a lack of faith on our part. We asked a dear friend who has done great humanitarian work in the Kibera Slums of Kenya what he thought of adopting from Africa and was it the right thing to do? Was it o.k. to remove a child from everything that is familiar, albeit utter poverty, and relocate them to our home in a rural setting with little diversity? His response helped, "If God has put this on your hearts, I doubt He will let you sleep until you do it."

Another year went by.

We mulled it over in our hearts and minds for so long, that the topic was fairly common place around our house. We knew that we wanted to adopt an older child because they are less likely to be placed in comparison to infants and toddlers. We knew that we didn't want to wait too long because it was important for Madison and Sage to be close to their new brother or sister. We wanted them to have plenty of years growing up together rather than Madison or Sage heading off to college having only spent a short time really connecting with their newest sibling. I think a few factors came together at just the right time to give us a push forward, as if God said, "O.K. Now it is time." We believe God's timing was and is perfect.

So, now we wait some more. We have one final step to complete our dossier, then it will be authenticated at the state and federal levels. At that time we will officially be placed on the waiting list to receive a referral for the next member of our family. Will we adopt a son or daughter? Or both? How old will he or she be? What circumstances in their little life caused them to become an orphan? What heartaches will they carry with them to this new country? What joys will they experience in the newness of everything? What will the depth of their loss be when they leave everything that they have ever known to live with a family that they really don't know? How much will this new way of life affect Madison and Sage? Will any or all of them have a bad day and wish we hadn't done this? Will a son or daughter wish they could go back to Ethiopia? Will Madison or Sage wish they could go back to the way things were? How long will it take to really feel like family? How long will it take to recover from a 30+ hour plane ride with three (or four) kids?! I guess these answers will come only after waiting.

We have many people ask how long until the adoption is finished. We are guessing (and I do mean guessing!) that we will be placed on the wait list sometime around Christmas. Most families are on the waiting list for 3 to 5 months. Once we accept a referral for a son or daughter, then a person goes before the Ethiopian courts on our behalf in order for the courts to approve the adoption. This process can take another three months. Once our case is approved in the Ethiopian courts, then we will travel approximately three weeks later. Adoptive blog friends, did I get all of that right? (I might be wrong... wouldn't be the first!)

While we would love to travel next summer, we are trying very hard to keep an open mind so that we do not have unrealistic expectations.

So we wait. And we pray.

Thank you, God, for this time of waiting. Some days will be difficult, we know, but thank you for these last few months with Madison and Sage as a family of four. Help us make the most out of this time and place a peace in a little person's heart in Ethiopia tonight. Help him or her to know that they will be a part of a family again. We trust you, knowing that you are working your perfect timing into this situation. We pray that it is you who is glorified and praised in the midst of our planning and preparation. Please don't let us ever forget that we, too, are orphans given a place in your family because of Jesus' amazing act of love and grace on a nasty, ugly cross. Amen.

Gladney Swim Party

2008-09-23T22:19:00.004-05:00

We attended a Gladney Family Association swim party this weekend. Madison and Sage had a ball and loved the heated pool. This weather has been heavenly! I cannot remember when we have enjoyed so many beautiful days for this length of time. Is there anything nicer than warm sunshine on your face accompanied by a light, cool breeze?! It was a perfectly delightful fall afternoon! (Hmmm. I must be getting old....I thought only "old" people discussed the weather!)

Monday's Quote

2008-09-22T14:54:00.002-05:00

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."

-Mark Twain

Some days as mom and wife get the best of me. I got a kick out of this quote when I turned my flip calendar over this morning. Have a blessed day!

Injera and Congratulations!

2008-09-20T11:55:00.010-05:00

Beef, chicken, lamb, salad, green beans, chick peas, lentils and potatoes!

Injera

My sister, brother-in-law, niece and I went to the Queen of Sheba Restaurant again last night. It was fun and we all enjoyed the family style sampler meal. My sweet sister is quite the cook and is now anxious to try her hand at making injera. Anyone have any suggestions or success stories? I hear it is quite a process to make. Because you use pieces of the injera to scoop up your food it is a utensil, bread and plate all at the same time. You might notice the large piece of injera under the food on the sampler tray.

Congratulations to Grace on meeting her sweet Anna for the first time! Read about her first day in Ethiopia here.

2008-09-15T15:03:00.002-05:00

We received an email this afternoon that we are officially approved by our adoption agency. Completing our dossier is next on the list. We are actually waiting on just a few documents and CIS approval to finish up the dossier requirements. One step closer to Ethiopia.

Pre-Teen Giggles

2008-09-11T23:52:00.003-05:00

Madison is going to kill me... the girls were goofing around on the computer tonight and I couldn't resist posting this "self portrait" of her and her sweet friend "B". They crack me up! The only reason Sage didn't get in on the picture is because he and Dad were playing baseball on the wii.

New Blog Design

2008-09-10T17:24:00.007-05:00

I am so excited about the new look on our blog. Nikki (a different Nikki) designed it for us. The money she charges for blog designs helps her go on mission trips. She is currently saving for a two week trip to Ethiopia in February 2009 and a later trip to the Dominican Republic. On top of that, she donates $5 of her fee for a charity. Currently her charity for the month of September is Ethiopia Reads. I think it is a great combination...our blog looks great and she gets to travel to serve others!

Dinner at the Queen of Sheba Restaurant

2008-09-09T22:38:00.007-05:00

Several families gather twice a month at the Queen of Sheba Restaurant. Sage has asked for a few months, "Is it the right Tuesday for dinner at the Ethiopian restaurant?!" So, tonight was a night that families usually get together. As we were pulling into the parking lot, Dustin told the kids not to make a scene if the restaurant smells unusual or if they don't like the food. We really didn't know what to expect. It was wonderful! Madison wasn't crazy about the injera, which is a crepe like bread with a sour dough flavor that Ethiopians use to scoop up their food. Sage was in heaven... it was actually acceptable to use his fingers! We ordered a sampler plate served family style. We tried chicken, beef, lamb, chick peas, green beans, potatoes and lentils. Each of these dishes are eaten with the injera. Sage really liked the lamb. The spices were yummy and seemed so exotic in comparison to regular American food.

We did not recognize anyone at the restaurant and asked our server if she knew the Bottomlys or any of the other families that usually get together. She pointed to a table of three people and said that she knew one of the women. I introduced myself and they asked us to join them. It was wonderful meeting Shala and her friends, Mark and Dawn. Dustin and I enjoyed sharing stories and hearing how God is working in each of their lives. Isn't it cool when total strangers come together with the common thread of Jesus and you can visit and enjoy one another's company? Thank you Lord for new friends.

"May our dependably steady and warmly personal God develop maturity in you so that you get along with each other as well as Jesus gets along with us all. Then we'll be a choir - not our voices only, but our very lives singing in harmony in a stunning anthem to the God and Father of our Master Jesus!" Romans 15:5-6 (MSG)

-NS

Gladney Gathering

2008-09-04T23:50:00.009-05:00

After school and work we made a quick trip into the city to attend a kind of meet and greet with Gladney families. It was a lot of fun and Madison and Sage enjoyed meeting some new kids. Madison was especially glad to meet Malak! We had read tons of great stuff about The Gladney Center for Adoption when we were in the decision stage and felt good about choosing them as our adoption agency. But meeting actual Gladney families and hearing their stories really added a boost to our already confident decision. One mom was telling us how much she loved Gladney because their philosophy is "family for life" and they are available for any circumstance throughout an adopted person's life.

I am terrible with names, but met one man who introduced himself as a Gladney kid. I didn't quite get it at first, but what he was saying is that he was adopted through Gladney when he was just a toddler and he is now 34 years old. We met beautiful children from Russia, China, the US and Ethiopia tonight. Go Gladney!

Happy 81st Birthday Boppa!

2008-09-01T10:27:00.018-05:00

Niece, me, Boppa, Sister, Cousin and her Daughter

Happy September! Where in the world did August go?

We celebrated my Boppa's 81st birthday on Friday. I am the oldest grand kid on my mom's side of the family and had the special first privilege of mispronouncing names as a toddler. Somehow grandpa or papa wound up as Boppa and he's carried the name proudly ever since. As a 30-something I still introduce my grandpa to everyone as Boppa.

My cousin was home from Virginia along with my sister and me. We took Boppa to lunch while Nana was gone for the afternoon working as a docent at a local historical home. A special note about Boppa is that he is recovering from a quadruple bypass surgery he had on 7/29/08. Doesn't he look amazing?!

Nana, Boppa, Niece, Mom, Sister

Later that same evening my sister and I made dinner for my grandparents and my mom. It was nice and the evening ended way too soon and it was time to head home. On my way out of town I stopped and got gas and this thing was in the parking lot:

It is called a tornado intercept vehicle. Ugh! Just what I wanted to see when I was preparing to get on the highway for an hour's drive home.

I cried today...

2008-08-27T10:36:00.010-05:00

Yep, imagine me, crying! I called our bank earlier this morning and asked that they prepare a document required for our dossier. A kind woman said she would take care of the request. She called back just now to say that the notarized letter was in today's mail (great service!) and then she hesitated. She said her prayers were with our family. She said she has a family member who adopted and had some rough days and wanted to encourage us. She made me cry and I don't even know this person! God is so kind to show His love through total strangers. In my silly tears I offered a "Thank you" to the One who has called us to this incredible journey.

"May the Master take you by the hand and lead you along the path of God's love and Christ's endurance." 2 Thess 3:5 (MSG)

-NS

Adoption Video

2008-08-26T22:19:00.008-05:00

For those of you who may be interested, check out these videos of Baby Abe adopted in Ethiopia yesterday. Grab a tissue, you may need it. Congratulations Team Alexander!

Cross Country Season Starts

2008-08-23T19:15:00.007-05:00

Madison ran in her first Cross Country meet on Saturday. She ran in the Middle school division. It brought back tons of memories from high school. It was a 1 mile race and she placed 4th with a time of 7:08.

On the adoption home front, we have started working with Kate of KBS Dossiers to help us prepare our dossier for Ethiopia. Dustin and I went to the local blood donor center last week and asked them to complete the four blood tests that we are required to have to adopt: TB, Hep B&C, HIV and Syphilis. I previously contacted our county health department but they weren't able to do all four tests. I was so thankful for the woman I spoke with at the health department. She told me to contact the blood donor center. Otherwise, our doctor's office/hospital fees for the blood work would have been outrageous. The blood donor center charged $65 per person and did a complete profile. One more thing marked off our list.

143,000,000

2008-08-22T21:00:00.003-05:00

Madison was reading blogs this evening and saw a great video on www.godtube.com. We went to look for more and found this video. I am not familiar with this ministry but LOVE how they put 143,000,000 orphans into perspective. When we were trying to decide on adopting, Dustin and I often asked ourselves, "But this would be just helping one or possibly two children. It doesn't even make a dent in the sea of children who need a mom and dad!"

A Favorite Quote

2008-08-21T00:39:00.007-05:00

"Life is the garment that we continually alter, but never seems to fit."

-Chuck Swindoll

Free Adoption Book Offer

2008-08-20T11:16:00.000-05:00

Just thought I would pass along the opportunity for a free book. The author, Laura Christianson, is sending a free copy of "The Adoption Network" to anyone purchasing "The Adoption Decision" on Amazon on 8/21/08. Following is an excerpt from Amazon's review of Laura's book:

"In North America, more and more families are adding members through adoption. And there are more ways to adopt—and kinds of adoption—than ever. This quick–start resource will help prospective parents consider key emotional and spiritual issues up front...before they plunge into the near–overwhelming mass of details and start to run into roadblocks, even dead ends.
Laura Christianson—an adoption educator and mentor, and an adoptive mom herself—brings her experience and knowledge to address unspoken but crucial questions about...

loving an adopted child
extended family’s reaction
expenses
openness in adoption
the role of birth parents
physical disabilities
emotional/behavioral challenges
racial and cultural prejudices

Recounting real–life miracles and mishaps of adoptive families, the author will help prospective parents—and their friends and family members—think through adoption’s challenges and joys, and confidently move forward from a firm emotional and spiritual footing."

Back to School

2008-08-19T08:39:00.000-05:00

Madison and Sage started school last week. Isn't it funny how we can't wait for school to be out in May to enjoy the summer with our kids and then we can't wait for school to start in August?! Summers are so fun and the lack of routine is a nice change of pace. But a return to routine is nice, too! Madison started Middle School this year and loves the whole locker and changing class thing. It seems like she has grown up over night. Sage did not get the teacher he was hoping for, but he already really likes his teacher. The kids had a pile of homework last night. Piano and voice lessons begin next week, so we are officially into the school year!

Application Complete!

2008-08-11T23:46:00.001-05:00

We did it! Our application to our adoption agency, The Gladney Center, is complete. We mailed the last required document today. Tackling the dossier is our next big hurdle. Dustin is quite sure that we have to submit fingernail clippings and written book reports that we completed in the fourth grade. I am trying to convince him that it isn't going to be that bad....or is it?

Pictures from Yesterday's Water Park Fun

2008-08-11T09:43:00.001-05:00

Thanks, Angel, for letting me borrow a few pictures from your blog!

Madison and Sage making new friends
Kaiya-home just a short 8 weeks ago!
Sami and Zoe
Silas

Adoptive Family Get Together Today

2008-08-10T23:22:00.000-05:00

A very kind and sweet Amy Bottomly invited our family to join her and other adoptive families in Oklahoma City today for some fun at the Will Rogers Family Aquatic Center. Amy and her husband Josh adopted the very cute Silas Bottomly last year from Ethiopia. We met families with adopted children from Ethiopia. Guatemala, Ukraine and China. It was such a blessing to see such beautiful children and visit with other parents. I especially enjoyed visiting with Michelle Riggs who adopted 9 year old Sami from Ethiopia just four months ago. Because we will be adopting an older child I was completely smitten with Sami. I hope to post a few pictures tomorrow.

We are often asked if we are adopting a boy or girl. At this time we don't know that answer. We are torn about requesting a gender because we already have a daughter and a son. Dustin and I do not want either of them to feel less than because we request a child opposite of their gender. God has called us to this amazing adventure and we totally trust that He fully knows the exact child that will become ours in the coming months. We feel like we did not select the gender of our biological children and so we think we'll kind of stick with that approach and not request the gender of our adopted child. We are also open to God having a sibling group in mind for our family. That is a little scary, thinking we could become parents to four overnight. Again, it's that trust thing.

A note to those of you who have sent emails or left comments to us after reading our first blog entries... Thank you! Your encouraging words mean so much to us, you cannot imagine! You know who you are and we thank you so very much!

Zeus

2008-08-09T21:08:00.000-05:00

Hey, Madison here. This is our dog Zeus. He is a 9 year old Great Dane. He is the funniest dog you have ever seen! Two of my aunt's friends, Kim and Danny, rescued him. He was emaciated and covered in fleas and ticks and they nursed him back to health. A few months later they found out that they were expecting twins and wanted to find a new home for Zeus! Mom had always wanted a Great Dane so Sage,Mom,and I just had to convince Dad. And two years later he is the laziest and silliest dog you have ever seen! One picture is when Zeus climbed into our old car when the door was left open. The other is a picture of how he sleeps with his head tucked under his chest.

What To Think

2008-08-07T22:31:00.000-05:00

Hey, this is Madison. To tell the truth when Mom and Dad first said that they were thinking about adopting I thought they were kidding, especially Dad. But at night now I think that wow, we are really going to do this. I think about the living conditions my little brother or sister are in. Every night I pray that God watches over him or her. Even if you stumbled across this blog on accident I ask that you pray for our family. Until next time...

Two Months Down

2008-08-07T21:54:00.000-05:00

Many of you know about our family's decision to adopt and if not, this post will be our official announcement. Long story and lots of wrestling with God, but we have decided to adopt an older child from Ethiopia. Dustin and I are from the "We are the World" generation and I think of the pictures on the news of the effects of a horrible drought in Ethiopia. I was probably 11 or 12 years old.

Aids and poverty have almost wiped out an entire generation of parents in Africa.

Did you know there are 143,000,000 orphans in the world? There are 5,000,000 orphans in just the country of Ethiopia. To put it into perspective, there are about 400,000 children in the US foster care system and about 100,000 of those are available for adoption. (Yes, we first checked into being foster parents before we decided on Ethiopia.)

I read just today that if 7% of all the Christians in the world adopted then there would be no more orphans. We sometimes feel like we are not even making a dent in the statistics, but we know that God has a child waiting for our family in a country far from here.

So here we are, two months into the adoption process, wading through piles of paperwork and enjoying our last days of summer with our kids.!